I wish I had an Angel, too

Sometimes I find myself getting lost in the dark mist that shrouds my life, sometimes it's a really dark mist. And I cry. And I want to scream, but I can't make any noise late at night. It's a mix of wanting attention and wanting to be alone.
In times like that, I fall on my knees, and inside my head I'm screaming. Screaming for an angel to lead the way, to hold me and to take me away. My angel. The one who's protecting me ever since I was born not letting me die until my time comes.
I even have a name for you, you know? It's a secret, I don't even say it to myself because you might listen, I even try not to think about it because you might read my mind. I know you're always beside me, but I wish you could show yourself to me. I wish you would hold me in the dark nights that I'm crying, trying so hard not to make the slightest noise and hiding under my sheets, so no one can find me crying.
I know you're there, I know you're crying with me, and I know it hurts you when I inflict even more pain to myself. Maybe you're protecting me from myself, maybe you're the "thing" that's stopping me... That would be okay if you would show yourself and held me in your arms, covering me with your wings and then I would feel your angelic tears fall on my naked chest.
I wish I really had you! Come see me sometime, will you?

Lost Angel by =Sugargrl14 on deviantART